The temple courts were filled to capacity with the faithful, vendors, and animals for sale. Throngs of people were talking and weaving in and around the temple grounds; vendors were yelling over each other, working hard to entice everyone to buy their wares.
The noisy scene was probably not unlike a modern-day carnival on a Saturday night with barkers yelling at those passing by, working hard to entice them to spend their limited money at their booth, not caring a whit about the people, only about the money they would make.
Faithful Jews had traveled long distances to Jerusalem for the annual Passover. Unable to bring “acceptable” currency for their offerings, they needed to exchange what they had for temple-approved coins. Or they could opt to purchase animals for their offerings. All at a steep price.
Moneychangers saw it as an opportunity for big profits.
Jesus didn’t see it that way.
He saw greed at the tables. “Thieves” taking advantage of people who had traveled long distances to celebrate the annual Passover.
Jesus was angry
Maybe more like in a rage. He stormed from one moneychanger to the next, turning over their tables, spilling their bags of coins to the ground, eventually driving all of them out the courts. (Read Matthew 21:12-13)
He was frustrated and hurt that His Father’s house had been turned into a “den of robbers,” an opportunity for profit. They had lost sight of His Father’s purpose for the Passover. They had lost sight of His Father.
(It’s so faith-inspiring to imagine Jesus turning over the tables of the moneychangers just four days before he would overturn the tables once and for all. Literally for all. He would surrender his life, the final sacrifice, the final sin offering, later that week.)
Harmful anger
Anger is a very real human emotion. Those who say that it’s not okay to get angry are wrong. At least partially.
Emotions are felt things. It’s okay to feel anger. It means that you’re human and that you’re alive. That’s a very good thing!
And just as it’s okay to feel anger it’s also okay to express that anger (in a healthy, productive manner).
In my experience, there are three ways people express their felt emotion of anger in a way that is harmful to self and others:
- Quiet (repressed) anger
This is anger that we keep buried deep inside. While the anger feels hidden, out of sight and under control, it’s effects are very real and visible. Alcohol abuse, drug abuse, sexual dysfunction, even physical ailments pop up when we push our anger down. - Verbal anger
At best we are letting off steam; at worst we are verbally abusing others. Neither is healthy or acceptable. - Physical anger
At best we hit things (like walls and doors); at worst we hit people. Again, neither is healthy or acceptable.
We need to deal with anger before we harm others, before we ruin lives.
Rather than burying our anger, or verbally or physically abusing others, we can take a healthy approach, and possibly eliminate underlying causes for our anger.
Helpful anger
Anger is actually a secondary emotion. If we stop ourselves in a moment of anger and dig deep, we’ll find a more direct cause for the emotion.
“I feel angry.”
These are three of the most powerful words you may every say out loud. Admit how you feel. Just admit it.
Then ask yourself what the underlying cause might be:
- Am I frustrated about something?
- Am I in fear of something?
- Am I hurt by someone’s words or actions?
I’ll give you a very made up example of each of these, as a husband might share with his wife.
- Instead sitting in front of the television and stewing in anger after learning our son has been suspended for the fifth time in six months, I might say:
“I really feel angry, honey. I’m frustrated that we keep enabling our son. That we’ve let his behavior go on for several months now. We keep accepting his excuses for bad behavior rather than holding him accountable. Can we talk about a different approach?” - Instead of responding verbally in anger at my wife about something she said, I might respond this way:
“I’m feeling angry by what you said earlier. It really hurt to hear you say those words.” - Instead of punching a hole in our bedroom wall in anger because I’ve been out of work for four months, I might say:
“I really feel angry about my situation, honey. I just got turned down for another position. I’ve been out of work for four months now. I guess I really fear that I’ll never find a job. That I’m no longer employable.”
The courage to share your anger
It takes real courage to share our feelings, especially for men. If you don’t have experience, just start!
When I finally started sharing my anger in a healthy manner, I told my wife that my words would be awkward and likely wouldn’t come out right. I asked her for grace and to help me express what I was feeling. She did and continues to do this for me.
So you’ll definitely need courage and a loving person to flood you with grace and a safe space as you head down this path.
But the results are worth it.
Admitting and dealing with anger in a healthy manner can…
- Release us from vices that harm us and those around us
- Heal us from past hurts that we’ve buried and pretend aren’t there
- Heal relationships that have been harmed by our anger.
On a scale of 1-10, how good are you at expressing your feelings? How well do you deal with your moments of anger? Do you deal with them in a healthy or unhealthy manner? When was the last time you started a conversation with your wife by saying, “I feel…”? Do you allow your wife (or kids) to honestly share their feelings without judgment or defensiveness?
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